Mourn, My Love
by KBlanx
Summary: Five times Kenzi felt worthless and One time she didn't. Spoilers for season 4.


_"And if you must die, remember your life."- You, Keaton Henson_

**Mourn, My Love**

I

Kenzi had never seen so many people cry in her life. Everyone around her wore black. Her mother barely looked at her all day. After everyone left her mother locked herself in her room leaving Kenzi all by herself. Kenzi noticed her mother carrying a glass bottle but didn't know what was in it. She didn't understand why her mother didn't want to look at her. She knew it was a sad day. She knew she had to say goodbye to her father. She loved him like any other eight year old girl could love their dad. He died so suddenly and her mother took it so hard. Kenzi sat on the steps of the stairs curled up in a ball, crying by herself. Her mother had yet to come out of her room. Kenzi didn't want to be alone, not right now. She slowly and quietly snuck into her mother's room. She saw her mother slouched over on her desk with the glass bottle in her hand. When Kenzi shut the door her mother shot up to look at the intruder. Her mother just stared at her. Kenzi didn't see anything behind that stare. No sadness, no recognition, no love.

"Get out." Her mother slurred.

Kenzi just stood there. She didn't know what to do. She was an eight year old looking for the comfort only a mother could bring and here her mother was refusing to give it to her.

"I said get out!" Her mother screamed. She then threw the glass bottle to the wall near Kenzi. Some shards were embedded into Kenzi's legs but Kenzi ran. She wouldn't go to her mother again.

Little did Kenzi know her mother would never look at her the same again because she had her father's eyes.

II

Twelve year old Kenzi was very small for her age and she used it to her advantage. She could hide in the smallest spaces and never be found. Today she hid in her old toy chest. She lay on her side with her knees hugged up to her chest. She tried to stifle the sobs. She couldn't let any sounds escape her. For if she was heard she would be found and if she was found... well then her stepfather would get to her. She couldn't let him find her. She didn't want to go through with it again. She begged her mother to make him stop but she would just turn away, with a bottle of liquor in her hand. She found that her mother would drink even heavier every time her stepfather was near. Maybe it was a way to drown out Kenzi's sobs. Or maybe it was a way to make her ignore what was happening to her daughter.

"Mackenzie!" He screamed.

He was close. She covered her mouth as to not let out the gasp that almost escaped her lips.

"KENZI!" He screamed one more time.

He was no more than ten feet away from her but she was perfectly still and made no noise as to not give away her hiding spot. She could hear the slur in his voice and knew he had been drinking. The days he'd been drinking he would treat her the worse. After five minutes he finally left the room and stumbled downstairs where he would drink the rest of the night away until he passed out.

Kenzi let out a breath she had been holding in. Kenzi would stay in the toy chest until tomorrow morning. She would wait until her mother and stepfather left the house. Then she would grab some of her things. She was leaving and never coming back.

III

Kenzi awoke with a start. She looked around to see if there was anything familiar about her surroundings. There weren't. She looked to be in an abandoned warehouse. There was a mattress in the middle of the floor, the one she was laying on. There were concrete columns all throughout the building looking as if they held the ceiling up. There were city wide windows that let the moonlight in. The only light in the warehouse. She then looked down to herself. She was in her bra and panties. There were bruises and marks all over her body. Old and new. She didn't know where she was or how she got here. She held the thin sheet up to her chest trying to cover her exposed self up as much as she could. There was no one around and for that she was thankful.

She didn't know how long she had been out for. Was it a few hours or a few days? Her body was sore all over. Her hair was a mess and even though she couldn't see herself she was sure that her makeup was running. She then looked to the other side of the mattress. She saw a lump but couldn't make it out in the moonlight. She crawled over to the other side to get a closer look. Her heart dropped when she saw what it was. It was a wad of cash. At least one thousand dollars with a note around it that said "Thanks for the weekend."

She dropped the money as if it burned a hole through her palm. She couldn't choke back the sobs that were escaping her lips. She shook her head trying to see if it would help her memory but it didn't. She buried her head into her hands while she sobbed for hours. When she was finally ready she would get dressed and leave without the money. She would never touch that money.

IV

"Fae."

That was all Kenzi could think about. There was this whole other species out there living amongst everyone else. And on top of that they were superior to her. It was as if her dreams were coming true but she never forgot that nightmares were dreams too. She had just been introduced to the fae world and she already felt worthless. She was a human amongst fae and there was not much to it. She knew Bo didn't look down on her. Hell, even Hale, Dyson and Trick were beginning to respect her but she couldn't help but feel...inferior. She couldn't turn into a wolf, she couldn't control anyone she wanted with a touch, and she couldn't brain wash someone with her whistle. She couldn't do anything. She tried telling herself that these people needed her to bring awesomeness into their lives but now she wasn't even believing it.

She grew to really care for Bo. They quickly became close like sisters. She never blamed Bo for the way she felt but it was always harder being around her and her kind. With humans some thought they were better than others and some were. Some were stronger, richer or smarter. But at least with humans Kenzi knew she could almost always out smart them and get into their good graces. When it came to the fae they looked down on her right when she walked into a room. They never even gave her a chance.

She didn't belong here. Not with them. So for now she sat in the crack shack alone on the couch.

V

She was going to say yes. She never got the chance to. The one person that didn't look down on her, the one person that actually loved her, the one person that made her feel like she meant something was taken away from her. She needed him now more than ever. She needed Hale to be here to hold her in his arms. She needed to smell his musky, sweet cologne. She needed to hear his voice. She just needed him. No one knew how to comfort her. No one would help her.

First Dyson. Then Vex. And now Bo. They all had put themselves above her. The people she had grown to love and trust had all betrayed her. Bo. Her "sister" was supposed to be there for her no matter what. Now she was running around with Rainer and her look alike. She never thought she would ever be able to forgive Bo.

Then she started reading the book. The prophecy. Everyone was in it. Everyone except her. The warrior, the Valkyrie, the healer. There was nothing about her. She now knew she had no purpose. There was no reason for her to stick around anymore.

"Unclaim me." She said in a hushed voice but it was harsh enough for Bo to understand how much she needed this.

"No. I won't do that." Bo said.

Kenzi wouldn't take no for an answer. She was done with "No."

"Unclaim me Bo." She said once again.

Bo looked at her as if she had so much to say. "Fine." She finally agreed. "Kenzi, I unclaim you."

And then Kenzi ran. There was nothing left for her here. Nothing at all.

I

Bo didn't know it yet but that hug was her final goodbye.

Kenzi saw the battle before her. She knew it would only get worse if she didn't do what she had to do now. Dyson was hurt. Tamsin was holding her own but for how long. Trick couldn't fight them all. She took a deep breath in and then a long breath out. She then started walking towards the portal.

Dyson saw her and ran over to her but she wouldn't listen to him

"Bo is the only one that can save us Dyson. And she needs me to help her."

"I'll do it. I'll go" Dyson tried to argue.

"You know it's me. I'm her heart."

Kenzi began to reveal her plan but not even she believed it. She just needed to convince Dyson to let her do this. She finally had a purpose and she had to fulfill it. She needed to do this to save Bo, to save the world.

They heard a loud screech. They both put there hands over there ears.

"It is the only way Bo can save the world." Kenzi shouted through the noise.

She could see that Dyson was now realizing she was right. He nodded. She smiled. She turned around and began to walk through the battle. With every step her heart became lighter. She might finally get to see Hale again, maybe even her father. There was this peace that settled with her with every step she took. It was as if there was something out there encouraging her to do this and she knew she wouldn't back out now. When she turned around she saw the faces of the only people she ever truly loved and those that ever truly loved her. Tamsin, Dyson, Bo. All with pain written across their faces. They couldn't stop her. She did this for them. She finally had a purpose. She smiled with tears in her eyes.

She would do this for them. For love. She turned back to the portal. With one more breath she took a step in and then... Peace.

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**AN: I had to write this. This season completely broke my heart. I don't think even time could mend it. Kenzi's character had been explored so well throughout this season and I was growing to love her more than I had before. Ksenia Solo's acting was beautiful this season as well. She broke my heart over and over again. Thank you for reading. Please tell me what you guys think. I really put my heart and soul into this.**

**Review, Favorite, Follow.**


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